U-Freqs are scallywags extraordinaire in the world of tech house. Brazenly mixing thrumping beats with dirty basslines and a large fit of the giggles, they stick two fingers up to the po-faced world of djs and producers who take themselves too seriously. Then kick them in the balls and nick their pocket money.

Born from the dancefloors of London’s underground house scene, Chris Butterworth and Aaron Trinder formed Big Hair in 1995 (while Chris and Stevino Talent from Tak Records were becoming U-Freqs). Big Hair released bass-heavy tunes such as Dougie At the Ockie that were soon favourites on the floor at Wiggle and Whoop Whoop; and the massive ‘Imagine Being Chased by A One Man Band’ that’s sold over 10,000 copies.

After years of pimping their tech-asses across Europe, on festival stages with the full band, or in clubs with laptops, FX, decks and sequencers, live MCs and video, they finally buckled down to the studio last year to make Sold Down The River on their own U-Freqs label. It was a live mix of their releases on the label, showcasing what they do and how they do it in a club. Bleeping and burping in all directions it rightly scooped Best Album in DJMag.

The irreverent chancers are now back in the studio producing rock pop act Rubicks for Gary Numan’s label, as well as the trailer-trash tech-skiffle of Howling Hickboy Handsome and His Mamma Lovin for U-Freqs. Also new for the label is another Big Hair-produced super-freq, the dark prince from the swamp of funk, “Lick: The Frog!”. Again the Hair inject their wonky bass and warped acid into this half-man, half-toad hallucinogenic abomination. Well, that’s what they told me.

In fact they told us rather a lot – but as usual – none of it made much sense...see what you can decipher.

Jane Fitz caught up with Stevino Talent and Chris Butterworth of U-Freqs to find out the scoop...

Jane Fitz: U-Freqs. Discuss.

Stevino Talent: U-Freqs was dreamt up by Stevino Talent, formerly of Tak Records and Chris Butterworth of BigHair. We felt we needed a home for our stupidest ideas, ideas that most labels wouldn’t release, stuff that made us laugh. Besides that Chris is on the run from a Russian circus that he pledged his life to as a boy and he needed a cover, somewhere to hide. Then Aaron Trinder (the other half of BigHair) got on board and u-freqs became the home of BigHair. It has now grown out of all proportion and we have our own North London sweat shop employing 200 Kurds and couple of Turks.. producing high quality audio soundscapes that we peddle globally. We also have an underground network of spies that allow us to farm talent from every corner of the world. Our motto being “scouring the earth for the one masterpiece in everyone”.
Please get in touch if you want
a) to become a spy..
b) if you have a masterpiece..
c) if you want a quick rub up (not desperate or anything).

Jane: Big Hair - a potted history please?

Stevino: They’re a bunch of cunts. Money grabbing slut whores that are desperate to feed their crack addiction. Chris’ crack is enormous. Actually Chris you’d better answer this question.
Chris Butterworth: Well at least my crack is a back crack not like your cute little frontal crack. Moving on to this year…We played a knock out gig (quite literally) at the legendary Glastonbury Festival (not much mud…luckily we brought our own) with a stunt stage diver who managed a Moses-like parting of the crowd and fell face first from the 10 foot high stage…he looked a bit confused for a while. But managed a smile and a wave, as he was stretchered off to the Red Cross tent. Fabric was a blast - u-freqs managed to unleash our new signing, the very talented and tremendously attractive Howling Hickboy Handsome and His Mama Luvin’ Band who love huddled the whole way through their set. It was an excellent night..but Stevino got a bit fresh with Judy the promoter so we haven’t been asked back yet…nice one Captain Penis!!

Jane: What do BigHair do?

Stevino: BigHair will rock your world, Goonie-style, with their sledgehammer riffs and Mr Tickle basslines. Or listen with beckoning ears like young rabbits impressing your elder rabbits with your astonishing bolt-on donkey-eared impersonation, to the frequish snap-view of the Big Hair live experience”. Whatever that means.

Jane: What are you planning for 2004?

Freqs: We’re launching the u-freqs online store where you can buy all our shit. www.u-freqs.com It’s getting a new look and a totally new refit. All the previously released tracks will be available plus all the new stuff and loads of the peculiar stuff we can’t legally release…so all of it then. Plus more! And other stuff as well. And free stuff. Also we’re working on an idea to revolutionise the way you have your haircut. The idea is simple…we’re opening a salon and as you have your hair trimmed you will also be fellated from below or cunnied if you are a women. We will have special trap doors installed below the barber’s chair and a team of trained small people will perform for your pleasure. We’re calling it Curious Cuts 'We’re confident you’ll cum'.

Jane: What goodies have you got lined up for the label?

Freqs: We’ve got some cracking stuff from Jacob London coming soon, we love them and you should know we married them last month. It was a lovely. Dave Pezzner’s dad performed the ceremony from their luxurious beach side palace in sunny Seattle (bought for by their ill-gotten gains and the royalties from u-freqs006). Bob’s dress was a picture. We’ve also got a freak in the truest sense of the word. He thinks he’s a super human, hallucinogenic frog…que? He believes that his vibe intoxicates his audience. We think it’s something to do with his garlic breath…did we mention he’s French? Great track though and Lee Coombs is doing da street re-rinse..da rinse it one time! Also, Hickboy has some more material on the way. He’s quite ill you know. He’s very partial to his sister’s touch and his mothers body warmth. The music is outstanding.

Jane: Who else do you work with?

Freqs:Adam Ant, Gary Glitter, Johny Cash, Wings, The Truro Male Voice Pub Choir, Dudley Moore, Jimi Mistry (you may know him from films like The Guru and East is East and underpants adverts for Burton’s Menswear. The Rhonda Cynon Taff Campanologists and not forgetting The Glass Coffee Table Scat Merchants…messy business, we won’t be asking them back.

Jane: And how often do you spend time OUT of the studio?

Stevino: I’m banned from most studio’s for being musically disruptive. Tak Records attribute their barren spell to the time I spent there. So I’m always out.
Chris: So I’m always in…someone has to do it. Plus I need to keep out of site because of the Circus death fatwa.

Jane: Been to any good parties of late?

Freqs: Yeh it would be characteristic of somebody who is ill-bred not to mention our own party which was the best thing we’ve been to ever. So good, that we are doing it again and again. Next one is December 5.

Jane: And artists that you really like at the moment?

Stevino: I’m dead keen on Phil Collins but I’m constantly told not to play any of his stuff in my sets. That just leaves me playing Wham! and Niggas With Hats (NWH) they’re fookin’ hip y’all..yeh get down..bruva…nice yee boy! Huh.
Chris: My favourite right now is Afro Celt Sound System and Mark Owen from Take That. But seriously I like Wang Chung – Every Body Wang Chung Tonight .

Jane: Tell us something about you we don't know.

Chris: You may recognize Stevino’s household face from TV’s Fantasy Island (da plane…da plane) and 007’s The Man With The Golden Gun…and for a laugh we faked his death.
Stevino: Chris has a small wooden leg…he keeps it in his fridge. Can we go home now..?

Many thanks to the lads for taking the time out to speak to us... keep an eye on U-Freqs!